When it comes to me I rather not define myself through a title or limiting stories because as I believe they do not do justice to the immensity and complexity of each human being. I am the adult woman but I am also the eternal child. The scientist, the manager, the artist and the entrepreneur. The intuitive observer and the dedicated listener who is passionate about life. My path is one of light and shadow.

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I was born into an anxious family, where everything is for yesterday. I had a happy childhood, but one that was also filled with challenges, recurring stays in hospitals and poor health. Adolescence was a challenging, painful phase, full of shame and discomfort. I began to develop the subconscious belief that certain unique parts of me were not enough or welcome in this world at all.

 

To survive I created protective strategies: I adopted limiting beliefs, I buried the parts that I least liked about myself or that I didn't think they fit in - my shadows- and I created defense mechanisms - my masks. All in a desperate attempt to fit in society, to be recognised and loved.

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I became a fragmented human being, my essence shattered into shadows hidden behind masks. In my chest lived an insatiable thirst to unite all these pieces, but with few tools, I lived in the illusion that something or someone external to me would complete/fix me one day.

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I studied a lot and I was often rewarded for academical excellence, all heavily motivated by this desire to feel needed and valued. I became a pharmacist because it was a well paid career, I worked in the financial sector because I liked the prestige it gave me. I moved abroad because I couldn't find me in Portugal. I lived my 20s in an unbridled search for external validation that filled my ego but not my soul. Sounds familiar?​

 

In the midst of despair and tears, on the verge of a serious burnout, I discovered meditation and began to question my life. In my early 30s, I dropped everything I had "achieved"; and returned to Portugal leaving my career behind. But it wasn't until I discovered the magic of breathwork and shadow work that I began the journey of my life - the journey to my inner self. I went through my darkest parts, I started to heal their deep wounds of rejection, to accept them and reincorporate them to re-discover this treasure that lived inside me - my essence, what makes me unique and complete.

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Today I live happier and with less things. Because in the midst of these shadows I discovered who I am. I found ways to channel the power of these darker parts and characters to benefit myself and those around me. I know who I am and that's why I prefer to define myself in a few words-I am an eternal explorer.

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This was and continues to be the trip of a lifetime, the one that brings me wisdom and calm regardless of what's going on around me. And I want to share this with the world.

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Will you join me?